Thursday, May 29, 2008

Hmm...

Well, I'm sitting here in tears and I guess I wanted to post something, not really for you but for me.

Something for me to read later, maybe.

I've been here a year and as cliche as it is, it doesn't feel like it. Time has flown by and now I'm looking at the tail end of my time here, wondering what my impact has been, if anything at all.

Of course, what I'm thinking about most is saying goodbye to the people here. I'm thinking about Lloyd and Anthea and their kids (my family) and how I feel about them. I know I love them and I'd do anything for them, but I don't want them to leave without knowing that.
My parents came here last month and they met with all the people they knew twenty-five years ago and the relationships that they still have made me think about leaving here. It made me think about how I'll still think and pray about Lloyd and Anthea in 25 years and how they'll (hopefully) reciprocate that.

That's just something I've been struggling with.

Another is being the first on the team to leave. Am I doing something I'll regret? I'm going home to work and go to school and I don't have anything here that I see myself doing after July, but I still hate the idea of going home.

The boys got an apartment today.

I was fine until Michael Horn caught me on Google. I almost never cry until someone asks how I'm doing.
So that's where I am.

Please pray for me.
Today is Thursday, May 29th. I'm pretty inconsistent with updating this thing, so I might be better by the time you read this, but pray for me anyway.